Well,you would think that after a month of not posting, I would have something to say...but I don't. I haven't taken any pictures since September. I don't like blogs without pictures, so here you go:
So even though I don't have a lot to say, I figured I could at least let you know a little about me. I thought I could start by giving you a list of things that I don't like, so here it is:- Cats
- People who say that I would love their cat, even though I just said that I hate cats
- Roaches- this fact has been discovered at work, so now people think it is funny to put live or dead roaches on my desk in anticipation of watching me scream like a little girl. Not Funny. Not cool.
- Hand soap that makes me smell like a chick. I like to choose when I want to smell pretty. By only putting chick soap out, you're kinda backing me into a corner. If I don't come out of the bathroom smelling like Japanese Cherry Blossom you are going to know I didn't wash my hands.
- Mornings
- Tight underwear
- Loose underwear
- Pretty much underwear in general
- Man Capris
- Bad grammar
- People correcting my grammar
- People who correct my grammar with incorrect grammar
- Honeydew and cantaloupe
- Chihuahuas
- Christmas Carolers- They make me feel weird
- Christmas Caroling- It makes me feel weird
- People who go for a high five when you are going for a fist bump, resulting in some sort of odd fist grabbing action that just embarrasses both people
- Music elitists who think the music they listen to is so much better than yours...MICHAEL!
- Folgers- It is not the best part of waking up
- Starbucks whipped cream
- Rosy Odonald
Sorry if I offended any of you cat lovers, carolers, or Rosy Odonald. Please note that if anyone pulls any shenanigans with a roach, real or fake, I will bring the thunder!
-Keep your pimp hand strong-
18 comments:
You haven't blogged in a month and when you do you steal one of my November ideas...nice. Anyway, nice to have you back. :)
That was hilarious! You and Julie and your dislike for roaches...I would like to see them put it on your desk and you scream like a girl...that'd be a funny blog.
That was hilarious! You and Julie and your dislike for roaches...I would like to see them put it on your desk and you scream like a girl...that'd be a funny blog.
Keep your pimp hand strong - what the heck does that mean?
~mom~
Mom, you have a weak pimp hand. You wouldn't understand.
Jeff,
I used to work for an exterminator. Once they found out I don't like rodents OF ANY KIND, all of a sudden I would get "presents" on my desk...like dead roaches in a baggie, or live termites in a baggie, noone ever went so far as to put a rat or mouse on my desk cause I would have totally quit, BUT, Matt brought me a present one day..he had caught a live possom and felt he needed to share with me. Possom was in a cage and I had to stand by the bed of the pickup truck and look at it. Have you ever seen a possom? They are UGLY. They look like HUGE rats.
Anyway, be glad you never worked for Spider Man pest control..once they found your weakness, you were doomed.
--sara
LOVE your list and agree with many of these. Just one question, however: Who's Rosie Odonald? Nevermind, I don't want to correct you since that's one of the things that bugs you.
Oh, and BTW.....that guy in the picture looks like the love-child of Gandhi and Coolio. LOVE HIM.
hahhahhaha. and i know what you mean about starbucks whip cream- it does that weird thing to the top of your mouth... you know what i mean? like wtf?
OMG.... I hate the high five-fist bump moment! If you hate that, you may also hate it when you are trying to talk , and the other person says something right when you do, so you both stop, then you do it again, then you both stop, then you do it again, then you both stop, then you argue about who "goes".... and you may also hate the walking version of that conflict... can't everyone just figure out that you both walk to the right? Unless its a hot chick, then you step in front of her like 10 times. Pimp hand is strong, I even added some baby powder on the backhand.
i HATE green melon, oh, and paper cuts. i reset my own broken nose without a whimper, but i will cry bloody murder when i get a tiny little cut.
next time someone does the hand/fist move, if you're the high five guy, cover that others person's hand and say "paper covers rock."
adding "b****" to the end of the statement is optional.
i HATE green melon, oh, and paper cuts. i reset my own broken nose without a whimper, but i will cry bloody murder when i get a tiny little cut.
next time someone does the hand/fist move, if you're the high five guy, cover that others person's hand and say "paper covers rock."
adding "b****" to the end of the statement is optional.
p.s. sorry about the double post... i loathe that too
So this is a late comment but that was some funny s*&#! I love your humor!
~christina
Soooooooooo funny! I hate it when cat-people say that too...geez...get a puppy already - they are awesome!
You are hysterical!
I think Rosy Odonald's name is spelled incorrectly, and I think me telling you this is something you mentioned you hate, so disregard.
Cheers!
I know that grammar is one of your things, but does that include spelling as well? For the record, it is Rosie O'Donnell....but for what it is worth, I just found your blog and you are super funny!
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